Seven Messy Babies

Soap gentle enough for babies, luxurious enough for a spa.

The Messes Before Noon

Here’s what just half a day in my life looks like right now.

6:45am: Triplets up and into the bathroom. Messy pull-ups off and big girl undies on. Emily up and getting dressed for school.

7:00am: “Mommy, mommy, MOMMY! Will you get my breakfast?!” Lots of hanging on my legs and asking for various assortments of foods (which always includes chips for some reason). Everyone at the table. Massive cereal bowl spill. Mushy apple jacks everywhere along with milk splatters up the legs of the table and chairs and covering at least a four-foot radius of the dining room floor.

7:30am: Still getting big sis ready for school. Trying to do hair in the bathroom leads to much whining and crying. Brush thrown on the floor shatters to pieces. Much more crying ensues. Baby awakened by crying. Big sis calmed down, hair done (in a simple headband for the sake of sanity), and off to school. Feed baby.

7:45 -10:00am: Many, many more messes occur. Large glass of water is spilled in the kitchen. New crayon artwork mysteriously appears on white wall. While that’s getting cleaned up, another masterpiece is being created on the white closet door in big sis’ room, this time with markers. While changing baby’s poopy diaper, a triplet misses the toilet just after pulling down her pants. (Yes, little girls can’t hit the toilet either!) Lots of running, laughing, jumping, playing, squealing. Feed baby again, during which time triplets conspire, steal chips from kitchen counter and eat them in “secret” hiding place behind living room chair. Crumbs everywhere. More potty breaks, squealing, running, playing. Sippy cup malfunction on living room carpet. Game of picnic leads to throwing of Melissa and Doug cuttable wooden foods all over the sunroom, someone hit in the forehead, much crying…

10:00am: Let’s go outside! Slather kids with bug repellent. Lots of playing in the sandbox, garden, water table. Kids covered from head to toe in sand, sidewalk chalk and dirt, matted and caked on their skin and scalp thanks to the combination of sweat and bug repellent. Several trips inside with various girls who need to potty or poo, only to discover that once we’ve wiped off enough sand to come inside, they don’t really need to go after all. Better to go outside anyway! One potty accident followed by chasing of naked girl around the yard.

11:15am: MUST take a BATH! All girls hauled inside, wiped off at the threshold so as not to track sand through the entire house. Sand still tracked through the house and promptly deposited all over the bathroom floor as they undress. Enough sand washed out of their hair to build a sand castle in the bathtub! Girls out of tub and fresh undies put on. Forget the clothes. They’ll just get dirty. Clean the bathtub as quickly as possible before the girls make any new messes.

Noon: Lunch. Why, oh why, did I give them applesauce???

Is it time for a nap yet???

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